why we can't have nice things

we break in the winter deep freeze
throw alcohol on gushing wounds
feed the beast

and they will let you alone
because they realize
the punishment you give yourself
will be much more harsh

an old rant about how technology is increasing exponentially.

‘Outdated’ is a matter of semantics…if something can be used then it is, by definition, useful. It’s why they called it ‘industrial music’…because it was industrious…the historical german reference to einsturzende neabauten (destruction is not negative…you must destroy to rebuild) is truth. 

Soon the concept of ‘retro’ or ‘vintage’ will be shoved upon us as the earth slowly (or quickly) rejects us. we will understand the concept of overconsumption when we are being consumed. But, it won’t happen in our lifetimes, so fuck it.

I stare at this fucking computer screen all day, so that I can go home and stare at a bigger computer screen. I want to be that hip girl that makes her own purses and grows her own food, but I’m lazy and KNOWING I’m lazy provides a sense of responsibility. A sense of responsibility I’ve learned to ignore. Wendell Berry was right…you’re damn right I enjoy a tomato I’ve grown myself, but instead I’m just going sit here and eat this crappy mac & cheese I grew up on and read reddit posts. Most entertainment comes from the internet and as I get older I’m learning I’m more comfortable in a textual setting online than having a drink at the bar. Eventually, we’ll merge with this basic concept of interconnectedness and learn to utilize ourselves as resources rather than sources. The subjective identity will no longer persist. But it won’t happen in our lifetimes, so fuck it.

this gentle giant holds my heart...

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