and i still think of
the four year funeral

angel

'you look like a four year old angel

with broken halo

fresh for the recital'

when you sleep i disappear

crumple to pillow

and leak for hours

she said 'are you ok in there'

he said ' i feel like a piece of string that has been threaded and used to sew a hole'

smell this

i can smell food cooking 

and i'm comfortable in someone's arms again

a nice little article on smells and memory

new to my room

There's something to be said for aesthetics.

San Diego

"Honest communication engenders mutual respect, and that mutual respect makes askers out of beggars"  -Amanda Palmer

I'm so very happy I decided to call my friend, Aaron, and ask to come visit him in San Diego.  He footed the bill, because he knows I'm broke and I'm so relieved he was able to do that.  I'd never had Russian food and, let me tell ya, it's worth a flight next to a screaming baby.

I've been reading Amanda Palmer's new book, 'The Art of Asking' and it's made me think of asking in a very different light.

Here is my tattoo (given to me by a guy with a 2 year waiting list, Kyle Walker at Guru).  We asked for a session and he came in on his day off to do my Banksy piece (which I could also not afford).  Turns out he's obsessed with sharks too.  I have a megaladon tooth I will be giving him in exchange for his time and kindness.

This San Diego trip showed me that life can be about missing, guilt, and remorse, but it doesn't have to be.  It can be about giving and in that giving you will see gifts.

"The gift must always move."  (-AP)

San Diego